Won’t it be embarrassing…?
When sentient beings from another galaxy finally descend upon humanity and conquer our planet, won’t it be embarrassing that, thanks to our movies and books, we’ve given them all the information necessary for them to beat us?
We’ve essentially taught them the following lessons (aliens, listen up):
- Make your computers use a proprietary operating system (if it’s too similar to Microsoft or MacOS, we’ll just send you a virus)
- Tell us you want to show us your planet, get us on your ships, and then you can cook us into tasty entrées
- Don’t have a mother ship that controls all the attack ships: we’ll just take the bitch out
- Pretend you come in peace, and we’ll all get together to greet you (where you can easily shoot us all)
- Don’t drink the water
Any other lessons our gray/green-skinned eventual enemies should learn so they can vanquish humanity in the future? 😀
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El Ñame- JGo Afirma Que No Importa El Dinero Sino La Gente, Pero Pregunta: «¿De Verdad No Tendrán Una Pejetita?»
- El Ñame Regresa Con Contenido Enteramente Generado Por Inteligencia Artificial
- El Ñame Se Crasheó Desde Dios Sabe Cuándo Y Los Tres Gatos Que Nos Leen No Dijeron Na’
- LUMA Energy Contrata Infante De Tres Años Pa’ Que Twitée Lloriqueos Sobre Por Qué No Han Podido Restablecer Servicio
- Ahora Sin Cuenta De Tuíter, Donald Trump Gritará Barrabasadas Desde Una Tumbacocos
- Dios Se Disculpa Por Haber Metido 10 Años De Vicisitudes En El 2020
- El Virus Del Dengue Asegura Estar Loco Por Que Se Vaya Su Primo Vividor, El COVID-19
- Santa Claus Tira Regalos Desde El Trineo Para Que No Se Le Pegue El COVID-19
- Duende Solitario De «Mi Pequeño Amor» Asegura Que No Se Le Pegará El COVID-19
- Jóvenes Boricuas Exigen Mejores Parques Públicos En Donde Usar Drogas Por Las Noches
Rafa\'s Corner of Nonsense, Part Deux 
Kinda different, yeah! 🙂
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Here’s one: whatever you do, DO NOT have a ventilation vent leading directly to your reactor in your mother ship/base station. I hear shooting a photon torpedo in there is as easy as hitting a woomp rat from a speeder.
Do not bring in any of your fighters into your mother ship by remote control with no questions asked. Especially if you lost it over 30 years ago in Area 51. It *may* have been compromised
Oh, and you may want to bite the bullet and pay a heafty fee to bring in at least one Cylon as a consultant. Those motherfuckers don’t make mistakes.
Rafa, why just apply this to aliens. After 9/11 we told every terrorist in the world where our vulnerable spots were (bridges, electric plants, tall buildings, airports, etc). We continue to do that every time there’s come news story on channel 6 describing how reporter Fred went under cover at the airport and got through security with X, Y, and Z.
Hehe, good ones, César. And the bad thing about having a Cylon as a consultant is that even the “good ones” are creepy as all get-out. 😀
Angelica, you’re SO right. Just today I was seeing a promo for a trick on how to open any lock using a special type of key and hitting it with hammer or something. Sure, because break-ins aren’t common enough: let’s teach EVERYONE how to be a burglar!!
When do these things go from “informative” to “criminally negligent”?
JA! terrícolas de mierda; no saben la q hay.
P: Anda, nos jodimos. 😉 ¡Gracias por comentar!